(Overheard in the Obama Bunker: ) "Sir, there's a war going on....

(Overheard in the Obama Bunker: )
(knock)"Mr. President-elect Obama? Sir?
(knock) "Hello? Sir? Sir, this is important.
(muffled voice) "Sir, there's a war going on....
(muffled interrogative) "Yes, there's a war in the Middle East, sir. Yes
sir. War. Israel and the Palestinians, sir. Hamas, actually. Who's
winning? (cough) Are you pulling my leg, sir? You are such a kidder.
Sorry, sir. Sir, the (pause) WORLD (pause) is kind of waiting for
something from you.
(muffled talk) "What was that? What _would_ Bush do? Which one, sir?
(rimshotttttttt....CRASH!)
"Oh, sorry, sir. I was trying to lighten the moment.
(muffled talk) "What _did_ Bush do? Oh, I see now. Sir, he told Hamas
to fold their list of complaints against the Zionist State and jam it
all into a really dark place within their persons, sir.
(muffled reproof, louder) "I'm sorry sir, I was paraphrasing. Sir,
could you come out?
(muffled talking) "Yes, sir, your meeting with your lawyer is very
important.
(muffled talking) "Yes sir, I know he bills $1,000 an hour. But don't
you have that web-funding thing going on?
(bumping, muffled talking) "Sorry, sir, I didn't know that was a
sensitive area.
(louder muffled talking) "I said I was sorry, sir.
(muffled interrogative) "How do you pronounce what, sir? Sir? Oh,
Ahmadinejad, sir. Akkhhhh--yes sir, like gargling. ....mad....good
sir. ....in....ay.....yad. No sir, no "j" sound.
(banging, talking, muffled) "Well, sir, he's not so happy. I think
he'd like to hear from you.
(muffled interrogative) "Sir, he sent you Christmas greetings. You
could say something.
(muffled talking) "Sir, they all say "death to America". Even the
Europeans do that.
(banging muffled talking) "Sir? You want to speak to Senator McCain?
Sir, don't you think we should huddle up with Speaker Pelosi first?
(louder muffled remonstrance) "Sir, I think that is going too far. She's
not that ugly.
(muffled laughter) "Ha ha! Got me there, sir. She is that, certainly.
Sir, Senate Majority leader Reid ain't so happy, neither.
(banging muffled yelling) "Sir, I can't tell him that. Besides, you
can't do that with a phone.
(muffled interrogative) "No, sir, I don't think this is going to blow
over. Look sir, can you send Emanuel out?
(fierce muffled yelling) "Safe house where sir?
(banging) "Sorry, sir, of course, if you told me, then it wouldn't be
safe. What should I do?
(muffled interrogative) "If it's McCain you want, I'll get him.
(muffled talking) "Yes sir, he really did say on TV that you were an
honorable man.
(muffled interrogative) "Yes, sir, we have the tape. I'll send it
over. Yes, I can loop it. Yes, really forever. Yes, sir, over and over
again.
(muffled thanks) "You are welcome, sir. Sir, how is that Illinois thing
progressing? Did Governor Blagojevich really ask for a million dollars
for that seat?
(banging, muffled yelling) "Sorry sir! Sorry! I'm out....